Last week I pulled the card "Expectancy" and I have been thinking about the word all week.
When you hear the word "Expectancy" what comes to your mind? The dictionary definition of Expectancy is: - "n. the quality or state of expecting; expectation; anticipatory belief or desire.
Expect- v. believe that a person or thing will come or a thing will happen.
Expectation -n. a belief that something will happen; a hope".
I saw I had always associated the word expectancy with "disappointment". I have many times in my life had expectations of things from people or situations and would, often, be let down. I also grew up hearing many times, "Don't expect much, then you won't be disappointed" or "Don't get your hopes up."---and I have continued telling myself that.
I also saw that I have manipulated people and situations to get my expectations met. I was trying to get my way (and I still do this at times!!). I had attached the meaning of love to expectancy when it came to expecting something from someone. I would expect them to behave in a certain way, or do a certain thing and if they didn't, then I thought they didn't love me! Of course, I would always be let down. Because of these beliefs, I have tried not to have any expectations about anything, then I won't get hurt, or disappointed. But that really sucks not to expect something!! How fun has that been for me..not very fun at all! I realized that I have never really let anyone show up in my life they way they wanted too because they didn't meet my expectaions. Sometimes I haven't been present and appreciating the moment because I felt it wasn't what I wanted or expected.
When I read the explanation of the word in the book (that comes with the cards), ("Your attitude towards the present builds your experience for the future. Hold a positive outlook. Stay miracle-minded and open to surprises!!") I thought...MIRACLE-MINDED and open to SURPRISES?! Nowhere in that explanation of the word expectation were the words 'hurt' or 'disappointment' or 'manipulation'. How cool is that??!!
I actually stopped and thought about it. This is a very different definition/idea about expectancy than I have had all my life. A whole new meaning to the word! I began to ask myself the following few questions (I invite you to ask yourself these questions too!).
Hmmm...my attitude now in the present creates my future. Do I believe that?? Is that statement true for me? Yes I do. Yes the statement is true for me.
Am I consciously aware of my attitude and think of it creating my future???? No, to both of these questions. Well, that isn't entirely true. I have been becoming more aware of my thoughts and attitude and have been able to change/shift them (stopping myself from going down the rabbit hole more times than not). However, I am not consciously thinking that my future is being created out of what I do/say/feel/think most of the time. I do believe that they create my future, I am just not consciously thinking about it.
Do I hold a positive attitude/outlook and am I miracle minded and open to surprises??? My answer to this one took me a little by surprise....my first response was "Of Course!!" But after much thought and digging deep, I realized that what was /is hidden underneath is not positive OR open to miracles. NOPE!!What I saw when I really took a look at this was that I expect the same old thing every day. I consciously don't think about expecting miracles or goodness or even anything different than what I already have or do. Why would I when all I think I would get would be disappointment?? Here are some examples of my "hidden" expectations...I expect that I will be running late getting to work. I expect that I will be tired after work. I expect that the kids at work will behave in a certain way. I expect that I will be short of cash at the end of the month. I expect that the guys I meet will be like all the other guys I have met and only want sex. I expect that no one will call me this evening. I expect I won't meet a nice guy and will be single for a long time. I expect I won't be going on vacation for a while because of being short on cash... those mundane and small expectations keep going and going. I know these mundane routines and expectancies and I think I don't get hurt or disappointed by them. But that is a lie! I am disappointed! I want more in my life! A fear of being disappointed has stopped me from creating and expecting more!
Am I consciously aware of my attitude and think of it creating my future???? No, to both of these questions. Well, that isn't entirely true. I have been becoming more aware of my thoughts and attitude and have been able to change/shift them (stopping myself from going down the rabbit hole more times than not). However, I am not consciously thinking that my future is being created out of what I do/say/feel/think most of the time. I do believe that they create my future, I am just not consciously thinking about it.
Do I hold a positive attitude/outlook and am I miracle minded and open to surprises??? My answer to this one took me a little by surprise....my first response was "Of Course!!" But after much thought and digging deep, I realized that what was /is hidden underneath is not positive OR open to miracles. NOPE!!What I saw when I really took a look at this was that I expect the same old thing every day. I consciously don't think about expecting miracles or goodness or even anything different than what I already have or do. Why would I when all I think I would get would be disappointment?? Here are some examples of my "hidden" expectations...I expect that I will be running late getting to work. I expect that I will be tired after work. I expect that the kids at work will behave in a certain way. I expect that I will be short of cash at the end of the month. I expect that the guys I meet will be like all the other guys I have met and only want sex. I expect that no one will call me this evening. I expect I won't meet a nice guy and will be single for a long time. I expect I won't be going on vacation for a while because of being short on cash... those mundane and small expectations keep going and going. I know these mundane routines and expectancies and I think I don't get hurt or disappointed by them. But that is a lie! I am disappointed! I want more in my life! A fear of being disappointed has stopped me from creating and expecting more!
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself what you expect?? What is your expectancy?? Has this ever crossed your mind before?? I have never thought about "expectancy" before in this way. It has been eye-opening for me. All of this was buried, unconsciously and now I can see it!
So, my attitude and expectation of "same old same old" was creating my future!! No wonder I felt like I have been living like Bill Murray in the movie "Ground Hog Day"! Expect the same thing every day, I will get the same thing every day!!
What will my attitude be?? How will my future look??
I am now consciously shifting my expectations to be grander! I am expecting miracles! I am choosing to shift my attitude! I am beginning to think outside my every day box. I think that all of this comes from awareness. Awareness of what is already there (a thought, idea, a feeling), and choosing something different if what is already there is not what you want to be creating your future to be.
One thing that I did not expect this week was this awareness of what I expect!! What a gift! I have a new level of excitement in my life about my life!! Yay!!!
So, my attitude and expectation of "same old same old" was creating my future!! No wonder I felt like I have been living like Bill Murray in the movie "Ground Hog Day"! Expect the same thing every day, I will get the same thing every day!!
What will my attitude be?? How will my future look??
I am now consciously shifting my expectations to be grander! I am expecting miracles! I am choosing to shift my attitude! I am beginning to think outside my every day box. I think that all of this comes from awareness. Awareness of what is already there (a thought, idea, a feeling), and choosing something different if what is already there is not what you want to be creating your future to be.
One thing that I did not expect this week was this awareness of what I expect!! What a gift! I have a new level of excitement in my life about my life!! Yay!!!
ALRIGHT!!
I have picked the NEXT word!! The one that I will be focusing on this week - The word is....
duh duh duh daaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! **CLARITY**
What is written in the accompanying book is:
Clarity: "Clear your perceptions free of confusion. Focus on intent and straightforward expression. See the world as it is without your projections, judgements and assumptions."
What would your week be like if you saw the world without your "projection/judgements/assumptions glasses" on?? Would there be a new view?? A new awareness?? Have a look with me, and let's see what we come up with!
What would your week be like if you saw the world without your "projection/judgements/assumptions glasses" on?? Would there be a new view?? A new awareness?? Have a look with me, and let's see what we come up with!
No comments:
Post a Comment